Self-Confidence and Self-Worth || Thoughts

21:02

picture of me
(scroll a bit more for english^^)

Aveam in minte alt gen de postare pentru astazi, dar mi-am dat seama ca nu despre asta vreau sa scriu. Desi scriu de obicei despre lucrurile astea marunte care ma fac pe mine, si poate si pe voi, sa ne simtim mai dragute, mai frumoase si sa ne dea un boost de incredere, sunt dati in care imi place sa scriu despre ceea ce gandesc si despre ceea ce simt ca ar trebui sa fie acolo undeva, nu numai pentru mine, ci si pentru voi, pentru ca poate, cumva, va va ajuta si pe voi.

Dimineata. Te uiti in "oglinda" si astazi nu mai zambesti si ti se pare ca orice ai face imaginea pe care o vezi nu e cea pe care ai vrea sa o vezi. Da, am trecut si eu prin asta, in mai multe dimineti, si cred ca toate (sau poate toti) trecem. E momentul in care incepi sa iti pui intrebarea daca esti destul de buna (sau bun), despre cum te percepe el, cel care te priveste cand iesi pe usa, despre cum te analizeaza ea pastrandu-si totusi zambetul pe buze. E momentul im care uiti ceea ce nu ar trebui vreodata sa uiti, si totusi uiti. Ma uit la ei (oameni), ma uit la mine, iar eu ca fiinta analitica ce sunt, mereu imi voi gasi ceva ce trebuie schimbat, si mereu voi compara ceea ce sunt cu ceea ce consider eu ca este mai bun sau reprezinta un nivel la care vreau sa ajung. Totusi, discutand cu persoane, mai mult sau mai putin apropiate mie, cuvintele lor imi rasuna uneori in minte si imi dau seama ca nu sunt singura care isi critica existenta poate prea mult uneori, de fapt, la un moment dat o facem cu totii.

Am observat autocriticismul in forma lui cea mai ampla si la fel de bine stiu si de unde apare, sau de unde poate sa apara. In principiu, oamenii nu isi dau seama cat de mult se pot schimba unii pe ceilalti si cat de mult influenteaza ceea ce fac si ceea ce spun felul in care o persoana se simte. Am cunoscut tot felul de oameni de-a lungul timpului, si pe unii poate nu i-am vazut niciodata, dar le-am vazut partea pe care poate nu o mai vazuse nimeni de mult, si anume o parte din sufletul lor. Am fost mereu acolo de fiecare data cand cineva a avut nevoie de un sprijin si astfel mi-am dat seama ce se poate ascunde de fapt sub un zambet cald.

Lipsa de incredere in sine e poate unul dintre lucrurile care afecteaza cel mai mult o persoana, si inca pe mai multe planuri, pentru ca nu ii permite sa vada ceea ce poate sa realizeze sau mai exact cine este. Tocmai asta uitam, cine suntem si ce suntem si nu ne mai vedem in "oglinda" imaginea reala. Si eu, si de altfel cum am observat ca nu sunt singura, deci si altii, uitam la un moment dat ceea ce conteaza si consideram o imagine distorsionata reala, pe cand ceilalti ar putea sa vada ceea ce suntem de fapt. Am primit la un moment dat intrebarea "De ce toate fetele au problema asta?". Raspunsul meu a fost ca nu toate au problema asta, sau cel putin nu in aceeasi masura, insa problema vine mereu de la perceptia aleasa a ceea ce inseamna "indeajuns de bun" sau a ceea ce conteaza, iar uneori singurul loc sursa pentru asta sunt in realitate alti oameni, iar apoi noi insine.

Si totusi de ce se intampla asta? Pentru ca uitam. Uitam ce ne face cu adevarat frumosi. Scriindu-va aceste randuri, mi-am adus aminte o mica discutie, o discutie care mi-a amintit cat de diferite sunt perceptiile oamenilor asupra noastra. Personajul in cauza era un actor, un actor care mie mi se parea ca emana o bucurie fantastica, iar eu ii adoram momentele in care juca, canta, sau doar aparea pentru ca imi transmitea bucuria si pasiunea lui, pentru mine e un om frumos. Totusi cei de langa mine spuneu ceva de nas, sau de gura, ca sunt nici nu mai stiu cum. Totusi datorita a ceea ce imi transmitea actorul, eu nu ii vedeam defectele, sau daca le vedeam, nu imi pasa de ele pentru ca altceva era de fapt important.

Asa ca, ce vreau e de fapt sa spun aici? E simplu. Nu lasa pe nimeni, si nu lasa nimic sa te faca sa uiti ce esti, cine esti si de ce esti capabil. Asculta-ma pe mine si crede-ma cand iti spun ca esti frumoasa, pentru ca nu esti frumoasa (sau frumos ca si la voi se aplica) doar atunci cand esti machiata sau ai stat jumatate de ora sa iti faci parul, esti frumoasa si esti frumos cand iubesti, cand zambesti si cand stii ce conteaza cu adevarat pentru tine. Asa ca nu uita, pentru mine, tu, esti un om frumos!

__________________________________________

I had another kind of post in mind for today, but I realised that it wasn't something that I really wanted to write about. Even though I usually write about these little things that make me, and maybe you, feel a little cuter , more beautiful and that give us a boost of confidence, there are times when I like to write about what I think and about what I think that it should be out there, not only for me to know, but for you, as it might help you.

Morning. You look in the "mirror" and today you don't smile anymore and you feel like anything you do doesn't bring you closer to the image that you want to see. Yes, I have been there, in more that one morning, and I think that all of us do. It's that moment when you start to question yourself if you are good enough, oh how, he the one that looks at you when you walk out the door sees you, of how she is analyzing you keep that smile on her face though. It's the moment in which you forget that one thing that you should't forget, but you do.  I look at them (the people) and I look at myself, and as a analytical creature that I am I will always find something to change and I will always compare myself to the things that I think are better, or that I should be. Still, by talking to people that are really close, or maybe not so close to me, I remember their words and I realize that I am not the only one that criticises her existence a lot, but that at a certain point we all do.

I have observed autocriticism at it's highest form and as well as I know that i know where it comes from, or where it might come from. People don't actually realize how much they can change each other and how much something that they say, or do can affect another. I met a lot of kinds of people along time and some of them I might actually have neher actually seen, but I have seen a part of them that not many see, a part of their heart. I was always there for anyone that needed someone to talk to and I realizes what a beautiful smile can hide.

The lack of confidence is probably the thing that can affect a person the most, and that in even a lot of ways, because it will not let that person realize their self worth and who they actally are. That is exactly what we forget and we stop seeing in the "mirror" the real person that we are.I myself, and as I have seen I am not the only one, sometimes forget what actually matters and we consider a distorted image as the real on, while the others can actually see who we really are. I once recieved the question "Why do all the girls have this problem?". My answer was that not all of them do or at least not in the same way, but the problem comes from the perception of what is actually "good enough" or of what is matters, and sometimes the only source of this are actually people, and ourselves.

Still, why does this happen? Because we forget. We forget what actually makes us beautiful.  As I was writing these lines for you I remembered a little chat I once had, and thinking of that I remebered how different people's perceptions are. The character that I am talking about is an actor, an actor that simply spread a fantastic joy, and i loved every moment that he performed or that he sang because he was basically sending that joy to me, and all of his passion, so for me he was a very beautiful man. The ones beside me though, were talking about his nose, or about his mouth, that they were like this or like that. I couldn't see those things, or if I saw them I ignored them, because of the way he made me feel I couldn't care less about his flaws.

So, what I was actually trying to say here? It's easy. Don't ever let anyone and anything make you forget what you are, who you are and what you are capable of. Listen to me and believe me when I say that you are beautiful, and you are beautiful, not only when you have makeup on, or stood 30 minutes to do your hair, you are beautiful when you love, and smile and know what is actually important to you. So, don't forget that for me you are a beautiful human!


With all my love,
Andreea


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4 comments

  1. Intotdeauna "omul" va judeca(critica) oamenii pentru toate insusirile pe care acestia le au si pentru toata complexitatea lor, dar de asemenea si oamenii vor judeca "omul", pentru ca in toata simplitatea lui acesta nu se va regasi niciodata in tiparul universal. E un mod natural de dezvoltare a personalitatii.
    Singura problema e ca unii critica frumos si unii nu prea, iar acolo scade increderea, parerea mea Dar daca ne intrebam de ce?... raspunsul e o alta Marie cu o alta palarie. :))

    E fain scris, poate in anumite locuri prea detaliat, dar asta depinde de cine citeste.
    Toate cele bune!


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cred ca face parte din natura umana ideea de a judeca, si adevarul este ca toti o facem,mai mult sau mai putin in functie de cat ne pasa. Sunt de acord cu tine, dar la fel de bine stiu ca nu numai critica e cea care duce la lipsa de incredere, am observat-o in diverse situatii, pe diverse tipuri de oameni si sursele sunt de diverse feluri.
      Mersi, eu nu as zice ca e chiar asa detaliat, pe ici pe colo, dar cum spuneai depinde de cine citeste si de asemenea e nevoie de unele detalii pentru ca mesajul care trebuie sa fie transmis.
      All the good wishes for you too!

      Delete
  2. Self confidence is so important, especially in today's society where we are constantly having the cookie cutter form of "beauty" tossed into our faces everyday

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I know that, but sadly some don't care about that.

      Delete

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